Fairytale Marriage

Before you got married or if you are not married yet, what did you picture your marriage to be like? All fun and games? No arguing? Romantic candle lit dinners every night? Always cuddling before going to bed?

That’s exactly how I imagined it to be. I knew in my mind that there would be hard times. Times where we might fuss and not agree on things. I mean come on, we’re in love. Things couldn’t be that bad in a marriage, right? Growing up, my parents never fought. At least they didn’t in front of my brother and me. A lot of kids that see their parents fight constantly and there are some that don’t see their parents fight at all.

There are times where it will be all fun and games, never arguing, romantic candle lit dinners and cuddling before bedtime. But it won’t always be like that. While fairytales are great stories, they also set up teens and young women for disappointment. In fairytales, there are always smiling faces, floating hearts around their heads and eyes that can’t be taken off of each other. Occasionally, marriage is like that. I’m not saying that marriage is terrible and it’s going to be boring along with an uphill struggle daily.

There are going to be times where you don’t have romantic dinner or even cuddle before bed. There are going to be plenty of times where you two will fight and not get along. But is that when you give up? Absolutely not. It’s so easy for a couple to get divorced now a days and most couples think that if it doesn’t work out they can just separate and go on their own way.

But that’s really not how marriage is designed. When you said “I do” you meant forever. Through the good times and bad, the times when you two are fussing and the times when you can’t stand to look at each other. However, those are just situations. Situations that can be overcome, learned from and avoided in the future. How you handle your tough times in marriage is going to have an impact on the good times in your marriage.

Since I never saw my parents fight (which I am thankful for) I didn’t know how to handle fighting in my own marriage. It took a lot of prayer, guidance and a lot of learning on both sides for us to know the difference between what is important and the things that we can just let go without arguing about. After that I think is when we truly learned how to love each other.

So think about this: how you choose to speak, act, and do for your spouse will affect your marriage.